Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Sexually STARVED?

Do you find yourself:

* Going to bed earlier or later than your spouse just to avoid the possibility s/he might get amorous?
* Lying in bed at night, careful not to stir for fear that s/he might start touching you?
* Being sexual out of guilt rather than feeling desirous?
* Arguing with your spouse about sex frequently.
* Blaming each other.

Do you find yourself thinking or saying:

* "By the end of the day, I'm just too tired for sex."
* "If you had to work as hard as me, maybe you'd understand why I have no interest in sex."
* "How can we have sex? The kids are always around."
* "If you were nicer to me maybe I'd be interested."
* "Why do you always have to touch me in a sexual way?"
* "If you weren't such a sex fanatic, I'd probably want more sex."
* "If you'd help more around the house, I'd want to be closer to you sexually."
* "I just don't feel turned on anymore."
* "I have a lot on my mind right now. Sex is just not all that important to me."

OR

* Have you been feeling hurt, depressed, resentful or angry about your spouse's lack of interest in sex?
* As a result, do you find yourself being highly critical or bossy?
* Out of anger, have you berated your spouse or been mean-spirited?
* Have your feelings of resentment about your sex life prompted you to shut down emotionally and pull away from your spouse?
* Do you wonder whether your spouse really loves you?
* Do you question your attractiveness or masculinity/femininity?
* Do you intentionally make plans that don't include your husband or wife?
* Do you feel yourself building a wall around you to protect yourself from feelings of rejection?
* Do you feel you've tried everything but your spouse simply doesn't understand how important sexuality is to you?
* Are you feeling tempted to stray beyond your marriage to find companionship and sexual excitement?

If you've answered "yes" to several of these questions, your marriage is at risk of becoming sex-starved.

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